Things that go bump in the night

Posted: Wed Feb 20, 2008 12:52 pm

Late last Saturday night, a young chap was walking home from the
> > pub.
> >
> >
> > It was a cold, wet, windy evening, and he was tired and freezing.
> > Most Of the streetlights in the area were broken, and the silence was
> > only Broken by the occasional sound of a stray cat sifting through a
> > Dustbin. Suddenly he heard a strange noise ...
> >
> >
> > BUMP........
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP........
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP........
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > Startled, he turned around. To his amazement, through the driving
> > rain he saw the faint outline of a large box turning into his road.
> >
> >
> > BUMP........
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP........
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP........
> >
> >
> >
> > He froze to the spot. He couldn't believe his eyes. As the box
> > approached from the shadows, he was able to make out its shape more
> > clearly. It was a coffin. Not wanting anything to do with this, he
> > put his head down and started walking briskly home.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP........
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP........
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP........
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > The coffin was gaining on him. He started walking
> > faster.........
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP.... BUMP.......
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP........BUMP.......
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP........BUMP........
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > The coffin was closing with his every step. He started to jog, but
> > he heard the coffin speed up after him ...
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... BUMP... BUMP...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... BUMP... BUMP...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... BUMP... BUMP...
> >
> >
> >
> > He started to sprint, but so did the coffin .......
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... BUMP.....
> >
> >
> > BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... BUMP.....
> >
> >
> > BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... BUMP.....
> >
> >
> > Eventually he made it to his front door, but he knew the coffin was
> > only seconds behind. Fumbling around in his pocket, he pulled out his
> > keys, His hand trembling, he managed to open the lock. He dived
> > inside, Slamming the front door behind him. He shot into his front
> > room, and Slumped into his comfy chair.
> >
> >
> > Suddenly there was a loud crash, as the coffin smashed its way
> > through the front door. The force of the impact broke the lock off
> > the coffin allowing the lid to swing freely on its rusty hinges as
> > it continued its chase .
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > In horror the young lad fled again, as fast as his shaking legs
> > could
> >
> >
> >
> > Take him. He bolted upstairs to the bathroom and locked the door
> > ...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. HOP... BUMP... SCREECH ... HOP...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. HOP... BUMP... SCREECH ... HOP...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. HOP... BUMP... SCREECH ... HOP...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > The coffin again gave chase up the stairs, across the landing and
> > launched itself at the bathroom door. With an almighty smash, the
> > bathroom door flew off its hinges ...
> >
> >
> >
> > The coffin stood in the doorway, then started to approach the young
> > terrified lad.
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH...
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH...
> >
> >
> > In a last ditch attempt to save his skin, he reached for his
> > bathroom cabinet ... He grabbed a bar of Imperial Leather soap and
> > threw it at the coffin ... still it came ........
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH...
> >
> >
> >
> > He grabbed his can of Lynx deodorant and threw it ... still it
> > came......
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > He grabbed his first aid kit and threw it ... still it came......
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH...
> >
> >
> >
> > He grabbed some Benylin cough mixture and threw it ...
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > The coffin stopped.

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2008 8:59 pm

thank god for benylin....

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2008 9:41 pm

Phew ... got away lightly with that one.... thought you'd be after my blood it was so bad!

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2008 11:38 pm

Is that's the best you could come up with Trish shame on you Rolling Eyes

Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2008 8:06 am

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2008 3:33 pm

c-g